The Over/Under: May 2005

Oh man, I almost forgot about this monthly visitor known as the Over/Under. And you thought I was going to make a menstruation joke...well, maybe later. As for now, it's time to get to the bread and butter of May.

Underrated

Music - Wow, there was actually a handful of albums that came out this month that I was excited to buy: Audioslave, System of a Down, Weezer, and Nine Inch Nails. Well...at least the first two were good. Weezer was very disappointing and NIN had more highs and lows than a heroin binge. However, Audioslave and SOAD more than made up for those lackluster performances. It's too bad SOAD doesn't sound nearly as impressive live and Chris Cornell's voice isn't nearly as strong live as it is when he has multiple takes. Hmm, someone's throat being stronger after multiple takes...where have I heard that before...

99 - If you don't know what this is, it's a restaurant. More specifically, it's a more upscale version of Outback. Yet they do take-out. Weird. Anyway, apparently if you order takeout there, they'll tell you 25-30 minutes. So when I ordered some food for a few coworkers and myself and went to pick it up 30 minutes later, and had to wait another 30 minutes, I got my food...for free. "That's not how I do business," the manager tells me. I say "thank you very much" and take my free food back to work. This is outstanding. That's what I call service. I had to wait a little longer than expected and since it wasn't brought to me when promised I got an entire $40 order for free. Now if prostitutes only carried the same service instead of venereal diseases, we'd be in business.

Fox - The return of Family Guy and the introduction of American Dad. This, my friends, is television. Kudos to Fox for getting their heads out of their asses and putting FG, one of the best shows ever created, back on the air. I loved their initial line of thinking, though: "well, since we moved Family Guy all over the schedule therefore not allowing your niche audience to follow it enough to get good ratings, we had to cancel it. But we'll give you another show that you'll most likely write and produce in much the same way." Way to go, Fox. I hope all those DVD's didn't hurt when FG's millions of fans bought them and shoved them up your collective asses.

Overrated

New York Yankees - It seems these guys are on the shortend of my O/U stick a few times a year. And after their horrid start they won, I think, 15 of 18. And then they played the Red Sox. Final score from last weekend's series in the Bronx? 27-9. Welcome back to Earth, New York. By the way, you're about to get swept by Kansas freakin' City. Oh, and Randy Johnson? Yea, he's real good, not. Remember when ESPN analyst John Kruk said prior to the season that Randy would get 30 wins with the Yanks? Man, I can't wait to laugh in his face at work. Five minutes later I'll be looking for a new job.

Britney Spears - Just when you thought she couldn't sink any lower she goes and does something like this...and tooootally redeem herse...wait, wait...no. No, she just sunk. She's now exposed her private life with "random blurred out guy on Cops", I mean, Kevin Federline with America. This is probably the first time I've said this but, Britney, put it away. You've got a kid on the way and you've let yourself go. You used to be prime real estate, now you're downtown Flint, Michigan. Not even the homeless minorities want to live there. That's low Brit, that's low.

Credit Cards - Apparently if you're one day late with your monthly payment they can hike your APR up to the max which can be like 25%. Hmm, maybe I should pay my balance off. What better way to do that than to pay it off with a new credit card!? Huzzah to debt, huzzah! (Shoot me.)