9am Ramblings

Let me tell you how much I hate Jersey. There aren't enough signs on their highways. There are too many highways. It smells. Therefore, Jersey sucks.

Why am I being forced to work on Easter? Worse yet, why am I being forced to work on ESPN's crapfest, Dream Job, on Easter? All apologies to Stuart Scott. He's got to realize this show sucks too.

I'm starting to realize that being on your own kind of sucks in that all the bills go to you. I've got my car insurance, cable/internet and student loan bills to go out in the next five days and not enough money to cover it. Oh, and you can't forget about that inevitable cell phone bill!

How is it possible that Be Cool was bad? I didn't see but everyone who did tells me it was terrible. There have got to be some pretty crappy writers working in LA if they can't make a hit with Travolta, Uma Thurman, Cedric the Entertainer, Vince Vaughn, the Rock, Danny Devito, James Woods, Harvey Keitel, Steven Tyler (Aerosmith), and Andre 3000 from Outkast?! C'mon people. This should have been about Travolta organizing a male prostitution ring and Christina Milian and Vince Vaughn have to break it up. It ends with a "Hell in the Cell" ladder match between Vaughn and the Rock. This stuff writes itself!

Stop snowing!!

Things I'm looking foward to: Hostage, Mudvayne's new cd, Robots, the headline that reads "Jose Canseco Injected Himself In Butt", Brooke Burke's apology for appearing in that freaky Burger King commercial with Darius Rucker, The Ring 2, the new season of South Park, my colonoscopy that tells me Chocolate Lucky Charms haven't been harmful, spring.

$57 for digital cable? Good Lord that's a lotta money. How 'bout I give you 10 cents and I just watch the scrambled boobie channel.

I'm meeting with an ESPN bigwig today named Barry Sacks. Hehehehe...sack.

I am freakin' addicted to MVP baseball 2005 for the PS2.

I've got a lot of beer in my fridge that needs to be drunken. Who wants to help?

Is there a reason why this column is random and so late? Yes.

March Madness is coming up I have a scary feeling that this is the year I win the online tournament challenge on espn.com. And because I'm now an employee, I am no longer eligable for any prize. That Murphy and his law can kiss the fattest part of my ass.

I got into an argument with Scott Van Pelt. Ok, it was a friendly fight and I apologized for some of my former classmates heckling him six weeks ago at the U. However, he's really tall.