Jenna's Tongue on Film...No, Not That One

"First Lady Frowns on Daughter Sticking Out Tongue" - that's one of the headlines on cnn.com at 12:07am today. Yes, headlines. You know how cnn.com works. They have a big picture with a headline as the main story and then to the right there's 7 or 8 headlines of the next biggest stories of the day. And this was one of them.

How on God's green earth does Dubya's progressively fat daughter sticking out her tongue make the news? Seriously. Last time I checked there was a lot going on in the world. You know that whole "we're going to raise the terror alert to code burnt sienna" thing which in turn bumped oil barrell prices up to $44 (which apparently is really high). On 4 year-old information by the way. (rolling eyes)

How about the fact that...hahaha, I'm sorry. I'm watching the Mormon episode of South Park as I'm typing this and the Mormons just offered Stan's dad rice krispie squares. Sigh...now that's television. Anyway, where was I? Oh yea, how about the fact that both Dubya and John Kerry were in the same town today campaigning. What are the odds of that? Do you know how freakin' big this country is and these two guys manage to schedule their tours to cross in the sprawling metropolis that is Davenport, Iowa? It's like if you go to the beach and there's no one there and you pick a spot and then someone else comes and pitches tent right next to you. "Hey guy, there's no one within 50 yards of me. Did ya have to set up shop right on my ass?"

There's still the Kobe trial, the Utah "missing" wife story, and a 13 year-old kid who literally got scared to death after running from a bear in New Hampshire. Oh, but I'm sorry. Jenna Bush sticking her tongue out to some cameras is just as front page worthy if not more so than these stories. Allow me to let the news media in on a little secret: Jenna Bush is a drunken, frat-sloppy nobody. Find something more interesting to cover, guys.

I could think of a few things...like Roger Clemens spitting sunflower seeds at a little league umpire and swiftly getting tossed. God, I love baseball.