From Holidays to (Devil) Horns

The Christmas aftermath. Well to put it bluntly, Christmas was everything I thought it'd be: predictable and boring with zero feeling. I had some fun on Christmas eve playing with my 2 year-old cousins and on Christmas day I jammed with my 25 year-old cousin (he plays drums) and we all had some laughs. And of course the alcohol doesn't hurt. But on to what really matters - the presents!

Christmas 2005 produced a plethora of dvd's, either given to me or received after exchanging Best Buy gift cards (I love that freakin' store.) And they are:

- In Living Color season 2
- Seinfeld seasons 1, 2, 3
- Simpsons season 5
- Billy Madison
- Happy Gilmore (Both of these were in a box set my sister got for me. Now I don't have to watch the crappy edited TV versions.)
- South Park season 4

Also picked up a couple CD's: the new Snoop and the 213 record that came out in August. So I must say the holiday haul was quite good. Capitalism at its best. Suck on that Marx!

Moving on. This is more like a smorgasboard of a column. Kind of like Joan Rivers is a smorgasboard of a woman.

For three days last week and three this week I worked for CSTV (College Sports Television). I believe I made mention of this last column. Today for lunch I went to the Empire diner which is at 21st and 10th in Manhattan. If anyone knows New York they'll know this area of NYC is the Salsalito of New York aka gayville. Every waiter there was flaming. It was kind of weird. I've been around gay dudes before but this was like bizarro world or something. They all seemed to have an attitude too. Like they were better than me or something. Are you better than someone if you like a lot of protein? I don't know. Is that a new "cool rule" trend like owning a pair of UGG boots? Which, by the way, are hideous. I don't care how comfortable those things are, they look stupid.

So after paying $14.12 for a chicken quesadilla and fried plantains I left him a buck and whatever change that is...88 cents. I refused to leave him a dollar bill; I don't want all that change. Take that, Queer Eye for-everyone-in-your-diner. Now, I don't hate gay people, I swear I don't. I just get a little weirded out when there's like 10 of them in a confined space acting like they're better than me. So needless to say it was an odd lunch.

However the night before was pretty sweet. A little bit of metal for the cranium. A night at the Roseland ballroom featuring Agnostic Front, Candiria, Full Blown Chaos, God Forbid, and the mighty Hatebreed. Here's a rating for each band's set using the following Metallica album scale.

***** - Master of Puppets/And Justice For All
**** - Kill 'Em All/Ride the Lightning
*** - Metallica (the black album)
** - Load/St. Anger
* - ReLoad

Full Blown Chaos - ***
- Songs aren't exactly different but they've got a great energy and the interludes are killer headbanging stuff. Plus the singer is a fat bald dude with a goatee who screams randomly, always a plus.

Candiria - ****
- How can you go wrong with metal with a jazz background, some rap thrown in and a black singer who can scream just as well as he can sag his pants?! Love these Brooklyn boys.

God Forbid - ****
- Heavy metal with a large dreadlocked black dude at the mic. These NYC boys tore it up. Some sick guitarwork and great harmonies made this set a fun one.

Agnostic Front - **
- The respect for these guys is immense but they didn't fit as well with the other metal/hardcore acts. Though their last song was pretty fun.

Hatebreed - *****
- These just made the place go nuts. I saw these Connecticut boys in New Haven at place an 1/8 of the size in August and it was absolutely insane. Last night wasn't as crazy but I still managed to get trampled in a circle pit! God, I love metal.

So moving on toward the new year there'll be a New Year's eve reaction column in the same space as the Over/Under December column unless something really crazy happens. Let's cross our fingers.

Stewie says: For every sprinkle I find I shall kill you!